The Perfectionist's Dilemma

“A brilliant book...a must-read for the frazzled perfectionist.” —Thomas Curran, PhD, leading perfectionism researcher and author of The Perfection Trap Break free of toxic perfectionism by cultivating emotional courage and self-compassion to face life's challenges with a 6-step program. In today’s high-pressure society, we are constantly fed a fable of individualism, exceptionalism, determination, and ingenuity and taught a mythology of grin and bear it; no pain, no gain; and hard work pays off, despite the fact that the conditions for success are unpredictable and ever changing. Psychologist Tara Cousineau claims that perfectionism is a paradox: it is the tension created by the need for belonging, a desire for excellence, and a quest for a meaningful and productive life. But perfectionism can be transformed by learning to connect both head and heart, replacing inner algorithms of comparison and criticism with self-acceptance and self-compassion. In The Perfectionist’s Dilemma, Cousineau introduces an innovative six-step solution based on the acronym EVOLVE: Embody the present moment. Validate your experience. Open your heart. Love your inner critic. Make a Vow. Spark the Energy of excellence. EVOLVE helps readers overcome perfectionism and cultivate three essential resources—inner worth, inner humanity, and inner leadership. Through storytelling and anecdotes from recovering perfectionists who have participated in Cousineau’s workshops, readers can learn to align mind, body, heart, and spirit—to become happy achievers.